We can never be too safe from awful speech. You know, speech with which we disagree. That kind.
This douchebag got on a flight and went on a 45 second triumphant rant about Trump.
“We got some Hillary bitches on here,” the man yelled. “Come on, baby. Trump!”
He then kept yelling, telling everyone that Trump is “president of every one of y’all” and if they don’t like it, “too bad.” The video is here.
Clearly the most dramatic reaction on the plane was an eye roll. One woman sarcastically said “we can’t hear you.”
Later, a flight attendant took Mr. Douchebag off the plane and told him that he wasn’t allowed to act that way.
It seems to me that the Delta crew handled it just fine.
“Sir, don’t be a dick on the flight anymore, or we wont let you fly.”
“Ok, I won’t”
There were no further outbursts.
Well, ok, there were. All over social media. This was a sign to the leadership of the National Association of Crybabies that this was the beginning of the concentration camps in America. This was their sign that The Deplorables were coming for them. You know, the same kind of hysteria that we saw when a guy whose middle name is “Hussein” came into office to take their guns and put them in FEMA camps.
People flipping the fuck out over nothing.
And, Delta couldn’t leave well enough alone.
“We are sorry to our customers who experienced this disruption. We have followed up with the teams involved and all agree that this customer should not have been allowed to continue on the flight. Our responsibility for ensuring all customers feel safe and comfortable with Delta includes requiring civil behavior from everyone. The behavior we see in this video does not square with our training or culture and follow up will continue so we can better ensure our employees will know they will be fully supported to make the right decisions when these issues arise.” (Delta Statement) (emphasis added)
I’m ok with most of the statement. Fine, you have to give everyone a tummy rub. And yeah, Mr. Douche was disruptive for 45 seconds. That’s a fuck of a lot less than the stupid piece of shit who always winds up stopping the plane from boarding because she doesn’t think the laws of physics apply to her suitcase — and then she looks at me like I’m gonna help her. See Rule 8.
Pre-flight screaming doesn’t really bother me. Maybe because I live in Vegas, and most of the time I’m flying home after a long work week somewhere else, I’m sitting there while the Vegas-bound revelers pour themselves down the aisle after their celebratory pre-game at the terminal. You think this guy was obnoxious? Have you ever seen a bachelorette party pour itself onto a Vegas-bound plane? How about every guy in an Ed Hardy shirt who gets on a plane bound for Vegas or Miami? How about any flight leaving Miami for Boston for the Patriots kick the shit out of the Dolphins in an away game.
I was “that guy” once — on my way from Fort Myers to Houston for Super Bowl XXXVIII. I stumbled on the plane dressed in a Steve Grogan jersey and a velvet pimp suit and ran up and down the aisle screaming “I’M THE MOTHERFUCKIN PATRIOTS PIMP BABY!” The flight attendants gave me “the talk” too. Fucking fascists.
Where were we?
Right, so obnoxious shit on the plane. Big fuckin deal. I deserved the “sir, you need to behave in this little metal tube” talk when I was playing Patriots Pimp. So did Deplorable Dan. But that’s the end of it.
Remember when we got all pissed off during the Bush years when people got kicked off of planes for wearing anti-Bush statements on their shirts? (like here) How about when someone found an upside down flag offensive? Black lives matter button kerfuffle?
In flight assholes are a problem. But, really? Would this be an issue if he got on the plane and screamed “FUCK THE DALLAS COWBOYS!” or “YANKEES SUCK!” So what’s the problem here? That he called his political opponents “Hillary Bitches?” So fucking what? How about if he got on board and yelled “NOT MY FUCKING PRESIDENT?” Or how about if he started chanting “BLACK LIVES MATTER?”
I’m not defending the guy. Deplorable and Douchey Dan was out of line. I’m willing to bet that I would hate him. I base that on very little — just my own coastal elite asshole stereotyping. Between his clothes, his accent, and his “yeah, y’all” shit, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t like him. I think what he had to say was fucking retarded. Had he been seated next to me and tried to give me a high five, I’d have responded with “don’t touch me, I don’t want to catch fuckheaditis.”
But, the flight attendant handled it the right way. Delta should maybe have issued a statement — even the one it issued, minus the bolded part. His behavior was douchey, but hardly as bad as 90% of the prole trash motherfuckers who don’t know how to behave on a plane. I’ll take him over half the seat mates I’ve had in the past year.
UPDATE: And now, to prove how politically correct they are, Delta has banned Mr. Douche for life from Delta flights. Let that sink in. He said one offensive thing, one time, on a flight and now for the rest of his life he can’t fly Delta.
And right now, I’m sure some sanctimonious fucking turdsucker will bob their head and say “well, serves him right.” How about you order some shut-the-fuck-up as your in flight beverage? Really? Because if you think this “serves him right,” then I can guarantee you that you have had your share of dumb shit to say, scream, whine, shout in your day.
I might not agree with Mr. Douche, but the only difference between him and anyone boarding a Friday night Vegas-bound flight in an Affliction shirt is that he shouted a political view that certain crybabies find offensive.
Well fuck you. I find your face offensive.
Marc Randazza is the national president of the First Amendment Lawyers Association
