We’ve all woken up in the morning with someone and thought “jesus, she looked a lot better in the dim lights and through the beer goggles.” The usual result? An uncomfortable bit of silence, an “I’ll call you later,” which never happens, and your buddies make fun of you a bit the next day.
Therefore, we can all identify with poor Sunday Moyo. Well, maybe not entirely.
Sunday Moyo, 28, was found by police officers performing a sex act on the donkey, who was lying on the ground tied to a tree, just after 4:00am local time, a court in Zvishavane, about 185 miles (300 kilometers) south of the capital Harare, heard. (source)
Don’t judge. Not yet.
When he was brought before the court, Mr. Moyo had the best story ever.
Although he was not formally asked to enter a plea, Moyo admitted committing the crime but told the magistrate an enthralling tale which had the court in stitches.
“Your worship, I only came to know that I was being intimate with a donkey when I got arrested,” he began.
“I had hired a prostitute and paid US$20 for the service at Down Town night club and I don’t know how she then became a donkey.” (source)
I’ve been to Bangkok and Tijuana, and lots of other shady places. I’ve seen hookers shoot darts out of their vaginas across a room and hit the target every time, pull strings of razor blades out of their cooch without a single nick, and all kinds of other amazing magical hooker tricks. The fact is, hookers are magic just like unicorns. So, who knows… maybe Mr. Sunday is telling the truth. Although, it does seem to violate The Five Rules of Shape Shifting.
No no… don’t judge yet.
He also claimed he was in love with the animal, telling the court, “I think I am also a donkey. I do not know what happened when I left the bar, but I am seriously in love with [the] donkey,” The Herald newspaper reported. (source)
Ok, you are now clear to judge.
