News & Media
Big Win for Common Sense and EFF
The Sixth Circuit Court of Appeals affirmed common sense this week. In U.S. v. Warshak, the Sixth Circuit ruled the government must obtain a search warrant prior to a search and seizure of our emails stored by email providers. The Sixth Circuit decision closely followed arguments of EFF in its amicus brief, holding that email shares fundamental similarities with traditional
Legislation banning "crush" videos signed into law
By J. DeVoy Ever the free speech patriot, president Obama signed the Animal Crush Video Prohibition Act of 2010 (ACVPA) into law earlier this month. The bill, which labels crush videos as “obscene,” contains a maximum penalty of seven years’ imprisonment for violating its provisions. (full text here.) Here’s the relevant portion of the new law, 48 U.S.C. § 18:
McDonald's sued for enticing children to eat poison while their dumbass parents stand by and watch
By Randazza The LA Times reports: The Center for Science in the Public Interest has filed a lawsuit against McDonald’s Corp., claiming that the company’s meals with toys unfairly entice children into eating food that can do them harm. (source) Here’s the thing. I agree. I agree that McDonald’s is rat dung. I agree that no human should consume that
'We operate on the principle that it's much more effective to detect the would-be terrorist than try to find his bomb."
Israelis are neither the servile fucking pussies that Americans are, nor are they brain dead morons trying to detect the last bomb. (source) Aside from the whole neo-apartheid thing, Israel seems like a pretty nice place to live.
Nothing can hurt a Marine – except Teh Ghey
General James Amos, the commandant of the Marine Corps said that allowing gays to openly serve in the military would “pose a distraction” and cause more battlefield casualties. (source) Huh? Seriously? Does this guy think that a gay soldier is going to be hiding behind a wall, shells exploding all around, and his buddy is going to rip off his
Introducing Vaughn Greenwalt
Faithful Satyricon Readers: I come to you after arriving entirely overdressed (and Moto Guzzi-less) for an interview with Marc in San Diego. My name is Vaughn Greenwalt, and I am apparently the latest victim to become a Satryiconista. My experience with the internet consists mostly of porn but I occasionally peruse Drudge Report, Politico, The Huffington Post, POPEHAT, Andrew Sullivan,
If you're in the military to "protect freedom," please see a doctor, because you can die of asphyxiation if your head is in your ass for too long
I remember when I was briefly in the army. We had all this rah rah hoo ha shit about how we were “protecting freedom.” With sincere adoring apologies to the people I love who are in uniform, that’s bullshit. If you’re in the military because you like the job security, then good. I approve. If you’re in the military because
For-Profit Toilet Colleges Preying on Fear, Deception
By J. DeVoy [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSV3dS2uc8g&fs=1&hl=en_US] In short, we have institutions that: -Get 25% of Federal education aid, yet -Are responsible for 44% of discounts, and -Forge records and use deceptive tactics to enroll students And yet they’re blaming the government for obstructing the relationship between potential students, who need to be saved from themselves, and these money pits. Hardcore libertarians, take
"Tater disease what brung us Irish."
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsBRfmErTEA] H/t: D. Sterlace
Abercrombie & Fitch brings guns to bear on cybersquatters
Lets say you go to the website “abercrombieandfitchstore.com.” What would you expect to find there? Probably not what you see below. That’s cybersquatting, and it is illegal. Abercrombie & Fitch have had enough, and they’ve brought suit against the as yet unidentified owners of more than 150 infringing domain names. Most of them are Pay Per Click sites, and it
Jenzabar tries to suppress critical website through bogus trademark claim – fails
Public Citizen reports: In a ruling this week, a Massachusetts trial judge upheld the free speech rights of a documentary filmmaking company against an effort by a Massachusetts software company to use trademark litigation to punish the filmmakers for the portrayal of one of the student leaders in the Tiananmen square protests. (source) Sadly, this kind of thing happens all
PLOT UNCOVERED: Secret homosexual plan to give America the gay
Eugene Delgaudio, a Loudon County (Virginia) local politician conducted an extensive investigation into the new TSA patdowns, and his findings are nothing short of shocking and revolting. We here at the Legal Satyricon been blogging up a storm about our suspicions that the TSA was run by incompetent fools or possibly by clever geniuses trying to make us get used
This is how you deal with a guy who takes advantage of your daughter
Helmut Seifert, 47, got word that his daughter’s boyfriend was Phillip Genscher, age 57. Helmut called the police, who said that they couldn’t do anything about it. So Seifert decided that he would do something about it. He got two buddies and a bread knife, went over to Genscher’s house. “The man was forced to remove his trousers and, fully
The Legal Satyricon is "interesting"
By J. DeVoy, henchman to the Legal Satyricon If this happened on facebook, the post title would be “Jenna Haze ‘likes’ The Legal Satyricon,” but I’ll take what I can get. The first link resolves to Ynot.com, and the second to the Legal Satyricon post Anonymous, we respectfully dissent (a defense of Porn’s Antipiracy push). Like most things in life,
Music For One Apartment And Six Drummers
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SylGOskjWw] H/T: Rogier van Bakel
Buddhist Thais Love Christmas
It seems that Christmas is an increasingly popular holiday in Thailand, despite the fact that Thailand has managed to (for the most part) resist the infection of mass Christianity. All around Bangkok, giant neon snowflakes, chubby snowmen, and full-size reindeer sleighs are everywhere. “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” and “Jingle Bells” pipe nonstop from loudspeakers. Weeks before the holiday,
Making the first purchase doctrine work for porn
By J. DeVoy Wouldn’t it be a pleasant surprise if you got $100 in the mail any time someone bought that bookshelf you made in 1995 and sold at a furniture show? If the porn business plays its cards right, content producers may be able to reap the financial rewards of a similar situation. But, it likely will come at
So now they want to ban another plant
In the wake of the Miley Cyrus “controversy,” California State Assemblyman Anthony Adams is whining like a temperance movement whore to revive his failed attempt to ban salvia divinorum, commonly known as “salvia.” Adams needs to un-twist his gray and stained granny panties. First off, we don’t need another law banning another plant. Second, anyone who wants to ban salvia