Once, twice, three times a loser

By J. DeVoy

Straight from the “it could be worse” file, some guy started a facebook group seeking 1,170,000 members so his girlfriend, Caroline, would marry him.

While bizarre enough on its own, this is his third and final attempt to win her hand in marriage.  He first proposed six months before the group’s creation and again two weeks before starting it.  Apparently not taking the hint, Caroline told him she would say yes if he created a facebook group that had 1,170,000 members.

What happened next is unclear from timeline of line breaks formed by equal signs and periods.  Users contacted the founder’s friends named Caroline – all three of them – and chastised the putative heartbreaker.  Caroline then declined the proposal a third and final time, despite the group’s meteoric rise to 1,436,419 members.

Custom dictates that a woman return the man’s ring when breaking off an engagement, and some states require it by law, but I think our persistent lothario doesn’t have any recourse in this case.  Unless he feels bold and sues for detrimental reliance under Restatement § 90, he’s likely out of luck.  The issue of damages alone would make this complaint lulz-worthy, since he’d be demanding cash money for publicizing his own awkward situation.  Restoring individual dignity is a bit outside the scope of a court’s equitable power.

Because going back in time and never creating the group isn’t an option, deleting it is the next best thing.  The faster it’s removed, the less likely it is to be preserved forever by Google’s cache or Archive.org.  At the same time, there’s merit to letting it exist as a cautionary tale to star-crossed lovers; a wrecked ship between the Scylla and Charybdis of love and ambition to warn others who would do the same.