News & Media

Murum Aries Attigit. That phrase gets batted around a lot with my name attached to it. But, what does it really mean? Caesar described the concept in Commentarii de Bello Gallico. It literally translates to “the ram has touched the wall.” The “ram” meaning a battering ram, and “the wall” meaning a besieged city’s outer defenses. Under Roman Law, a general had the right to offer any terms to a besieged city. As long as the city submitted, the terms could be quite favorable. The Romans were quite civilized in this regard, and dispensing quite favorable, even beneficial, terms was not uncommon. Why destroy a city if you can turn it into an ally? Of course, these terms were not

As someone who blogs, it bugs me when other people steal my work and re-post it on their own blogs. It bothers me even if they provide a link back. Why? Because fuck you. This is my work. If you want to quote part of it, you’re most welcome. You feel like you need to do a large block quote? Go ahead. You hate it and want to ridicule it? Go ahead. You think I’m awesome? You must be sick. What I’m getting at is fair use is fine, but just ripping off my shit is douchetastic. When I find someone doing this to me, I send a friendly DMCA takedown notice, or sometimes a friendly “don’t be an asshole”

Yesterday, I wrote this: I personally have not seen The Interview. I watched the trailer for it. That is two minutes and 28 seconds of my life that I want back. I sure as hell don’t want to waste my time watching this movie. Well, of course, I do predict that one day I’ll be wasted enough to watch it, and then I will wake up feeling a bit of shame. (source) Today, stone cold sober, I said “fuck it” and watched the thing. Holy fuckballs was I wrong. It was awesome. Let me define “awesome.” To me, a movie with stupid Seth Rogen and James Franco smoking dope, with gratuitous nudity, and some pretty fun violence scenes is awesome.

The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court just issued a unanimous opinion in Commonwealth v. Johnson – a case in which William and Gail Johnson found themselves on the ass-end of a prosecution after engaging in a pretty persistent course of harassment. The Johnsons were convicted under Mass. Gen. L. c. 265, § 43A: Whoever willfully and maliciously engages in a knowing pattern of conduct or series of acts over a period of time directed at a specific person, which seriously alarms that person and would cause a reasonable person to suffer substantial emotional distress, shall be guilty of the crime of criminal harassment and shall be punished by imprisonment in a house of correction for not more than 2 ½ years

If you ever read this blog, you’ll already know that I think the United States is a cowardly bunch of mewling pussies hiding behind some very out-of-date fairy tales to try and appear otherwise. It is as if Dick Cheney gelded us 5 minutes after Osama Bin Laden punched us in the nose. (see, see, see, see, see) While we peed our pants and dissolved more important freedoms than this, it is pretty telling that you can’t even take fucking pie filling on an airplane, because terrorism. (Enjoy this video for more of that) So, it was no surprise at all when a mere whisper of a “9-11 style attack” meant that theater owners and Sony USA all ran whelping

In some cultures, Dr. Theopolis would be considered “bling.” That is all

The motion we filed on behalf of Argentine journalist Jorge Lanata was granted yesterday. (Order) The order has some very inspiring language in it. When a judge cites to Madison’s writings, you know you’ve had a good day as a First Amendment lawyer. JAMES MADISON, THE FEDERALIST NO. 51 (“If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary. In framing a government which is to be administered by men over men, the great difficulty lies in this: you must first enable the government to control the governed; and in the next place oblige it to control itself.”); Globe Newspaper Co. v. Superior Court for Norfolk Cnty., 457 U.S. 596, 606 (1982) (“[T]he right

I have the privilege of representing Argentine journalist Jorge Lanata and The Center for Investigative Journalism in the Americas. I’ll let them speak for themselves – here – but suffice to say, I’m quite proud to be working for them.

On this day, in 1941, the Empire of Japan attacked the United States. We reacted by kicking the shit out of them. It wasn’t all a Frank Capra film. We made some little mistakes along the way, internment camps for Japanese and Italians, for example. But, for the most part, we went through the War with our ideals intact. In fact, WWII spurred us to be even better. We didn’t change who we were because some pussy-assed “Emperor” okayed an attack on us. When we rolled into a place, they called us “liberators.” That was when this country had courage and conviction. That was when “land of the free, and home of the brave” was the goddamned truth. Never forget,

“[F]eminists adore trigger warnings because it reinforces the idea that women are ruled by their emotions, are incapable of recovering from trauma and are just generally hysterical nitwits unprepared to confront adulthood and reality.” (source)

I do not think much of Julien Blanc. That much has made its rounds on the internets due to a letter I wrote. I did not release that letter to the public, so I do not want to link to it. Despite having a very negative opinion of Blanc, I was dismayed to see this — that he has been denied a visa to enter the UK because of his thoughts. (source) As objectionable as I find Mr. Blanc, I find no justification to deny a guy entry to your country, because you’re afraid that he will speak bad words. Fuck the UK. For no other reason than they finally went and did something that makes me side WITH Julien

I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors. Some woman claims that Bill Cosby raped her 30 years ago. He allegedly gave her a pill and some wine. Did it happen? I dunno. Maybe I just don’t want to believe that Bill Cosby would ever do anything bad to anyone. So for now, I’m in the “anything could be true, but doesn’t sound legit” camp. I would, however, like to take sides against him on one thing, and one thing only. His lawyer’s attempt to claim that a demand letter sent to Buzzfeed is “confidential.” (source) For those of you who are regular readers, you already know that this is bullshit, because you read “I DECLARE CONFIDENTIALITY!” No, not the rape thing.

I have no idea what E-Ventures does. Here’s their website. You figure it out. For all I know, it is the next big thing. I do know that it brought what seems to be a doomed claim. (Complaint) Apparently, Google decided that E-Ventures had behaved a little “spammy.” That seems strange to me, since I can’t recall the last time Google made a decision like that. Nevertheless, Google decided to de-list a bunch of E-Ventures’ websites from its directory. So, now E-Ventures filed a lawsuit over Google’s search results (or lack thereof). I started writing this post when I first saw the complaint, but one thing led to another and I didn’t have time to write a full post. Fortunately,

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DCDYSJwwE4]

Most people think that first the Berlin wall fell, and then East Germans got their freedom. “The Collapse: The Accidental Opening of the Berlin Wall,” a recent book by Mary Elise Sarotte explains that it is the opposite. Whereas the larger context of perestroika and the attractions of the West played an important role, the decisive factor was the conduct of provincial actors—information smugglers, pastors, artists, students, journalists and housewives who met every week mostly at churches, and slowly undermined the regime. (source) But what made the wall fall? Apparently, Communist Party Official Günter Schabowski did not know how to handle a press conference. (source) He bungled a question, leading to confusion about a plan to relax travel restrictions a

I received an inquiry from a party who needs First Amendment counsel in Florida. I have a conflict, so I can’t do it. It is pro bono or perhaps super-duper low bono. It will be fun. (It is representing three individuals against Roca Labs in Broward County) Contact me at mjr at randazza dot com for details if you are interested and licensed in Florida.

This weekend, I was lecturing my kids before they went out to ride bikes. I asked them “what is the most dangerous car?” The answer I was looking for was “a car going in reverse.” My son furrowed his brow, and then his eyes popped! “A POLICE CAR!” I hugged him and said “That is exactly right, you get full points. But also watch out for cars backing out of their driveways.” And isn’t that sad? When I was a kid, we were taught that the police were our friends. In some towns, that might still be the case. And, for a four year old, that is still probably the case, no matter where you are, as long as that

You all remember SkyNet Google? You know, that little company that could? The one that swore “Don’t Be Evil” and “Make the World a Better Place” were its mantras? Yeah, then they turned into a bunch of evil fucks who would wrap the constitution around the Hulk’s dick and tell it to rape a handicapped child, as long as it increased their stock value? Well, at least they finally made a move in the right direction. They finally admit that maybe they have “outgrown” the “Don’t Be Evil” thing. (source) It is nice to hear them speaking the truth.