News & Media
More TSA Trash
A woman had the audacity to complain to the TSA that the screeners in Phoenix did not know their own procedures — which allow for alternative screening for medical liquids. Breast milk is classified as a “medical liquid.” The brave TSA agents, who make us all safe, saw her coming a week later. They made sure that she would miss
Jesus is a dick, Bills fans and poor people already know this
The media is all aflutter over Buffalo Bills receiver, Steve Johnson, who dropped a game-winning pass, and then used Twitter to blame the Magic Space Zombie Jew. Mr. Johnson, I agree. The thing is, Jesus is a dick. The ungrateful fuck just flies around in space, demanding that we bow down and kiss his ass, and meanwhile, what does he
Homeland Security now seizing domain names
By J. DeVoy ICE appears to be targeting sites that help Internet users download copyrighted music, as well as sites that sell bootleg goods, such as fake designer handbags. The sites are replaced with a note from the government: “This domain named has been seized by ICE, Homeland Security Investigations.” (source.) Upon trying to access 51607.com, one of the affected
Anonymous, we respectfully dissent (A defense of Porn's Antipiracy push)
By Randazza & DeVoy Over the years, we’ve been keenly aware of the *Chan websites’ user base and their exploits. From 4Chan, 7Chan, 7-11Chan, 420Chan and especially /b/ and /i/, we’ve laughed and cheered as a teeming mass of faceless internet users upended society. They’ve collectively brought animal torturers to justice; rigged the voting on Dancing with the Stars; exploited
A Thanksgiving Prayer – William S. Burroughs
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLSveRGmpIE] h/t Bob
Maybe it was the Jesus, and not the Dope?
The Hunterdon County (NJ) Democrat had a headline that read: Marijuana-crazed teen runs from Clinton Twp. home in pajamas, barefoot, prompting widespread search, police report The boy’s parents told Patrolman Sean Ross that the boy had been at home with a group of friends when he suddenly burst into their bedroom proclaiming “Jesus is our savior” and other related comments,
Aaaaahhh…. shadaaaap! And a plan to reform the student loan system
Student loans suck. I’m not going to bother going through all the reasons they suck, as plenty of people have done that before me. I just paid mine off, because I despised paying that crack whore, Sallie Mae, every month. Nevertheless, I just want to slap some people when they whine about their student loans. Kelli Space, age 23, for
Cry Me A Fucking River, You Lowlife
It seems that the morale at the TSA is falling, because the poor dipshits in blue polyester don’t like it when we call them nasty names. (source) I’d say that if morale is crashing at the TSA because the American people are finally waking up and finally refusing to go quietly into the Constitutional limbo that the power hungry hall
Subcultures that make no sense
By J. DeVoy For example, the hipsters seen in this video. (Be cautious depending on your employer.) It’s just YouTube, so why am I not linking to it? It’s not particularly work safe, and there’s an open 18 U.S.C. § 2257 question about the appropriate documentation for this work, whose protagonist starts masturbating in front of a crowd of identical-looking
I wish I lived in Roman times
Because then we would throw these fucking child abusing nutbags to lions. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXVPjg7gNBw]
Ron Paul – Right Again
The ol’ doc’s oratory skills seem a bit off here, but he has the right idea (as usual). Personally, I’d prefer legislation that makes every American immune from prosecution if they punch a TSA employee in the face. But, I’ll settle for Rep. Paul’s bill. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qwsdq69AHnw]
Training Day
Faithful Readers: I arrive at headquarters with two black shirts, two pairs of black pants, one pair of black boots, two pairs of black socks, one black jacket, an army surplus mattress, and three hundred dollars personal burial money. My handle is Splifton and my resume is not impressive. I plan on contributing tangentially relevant popular culture articles to The
What is the TSA's Job, Really? (Applause for John Tyner)
Back in February, I wrote that it was time for a social revolt against the TSA. The idea was that everyone should treat TSA agents like shit. I haven’t met any outside an airport — probably because I don’t frequent places where uneducated ‘tards hang out. Accordingly, I wasn’t able to employ my own strategy. I’d like to renew the
On Corporations and Free Speech
By J. DeVoy Earlier this month, when I danced on Russ Feingold’s political grave, Randazza and several others critiqued the desirability of unbridled free speech for corporations. This is a subject where many will have to agree to disagree. Since defending corporations seems to be the minority position, though, I think the rationale should be clearly delineated. In many ways,
The Legal Satyricon guide to child care
By J. DeVoy [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydHMU05BknE&fs=1&hl=en_US] Ah… to see into the future.
Jamey Petree – Asshat of the Week
A Michigan father has filed a lawsuit against his daughter’s local school district, claiming that her civil rights were violated when her fifth-grade teacher read certain portions of a children’s book by Julius Lester, the noted civil rights scholar and author. The passages from the book apparently used the word “nigger” in them and discuss the buying and selling of
Lamebook, We Support You!
by Jason Fischer I know this story is already a couple of days old, but we think it’s still worth reporting on. For anyone who doesn’t know what’s going on, Facebook has been on a tear recently trying to flex its trademark muscles, suing and threatening to sue pretty much anyone who uses the word “book” in their name. Well
Goddamnit, California, when are you gonna learn?
by Jason Fischer When are you gonna learn that legislation and regulation are not a substitute for parenting? If your kid is too fat, don’t buy them the effing happy meal. Problem solved. Banning products is the worst form of government intrusion. Period. And while we’re on the subject of banned products — thanks alot, stoners, for sitting on the
Shame on Wisconsin
Shame on Wisconsin. You just threw out the only member of the U.S. Senate with any integrity. You just demonstrated that this country is ruled by a small cabal of moneyed interests, with millions of uneducated rednecks as their foot soldiers. Feingold was our last citizen-senator. He was, for his entire time in office, the poorest member of the Senate,
Good riddance to Russ Feingold
By J. DeVoy Russell Feingold will be an ex-senator in January. It’s not soon enough. Feingold, half of the propulsion behind the McCain-Feingold Act that limited political speech and chipped away at your First Amendment protections, was never the reformer he portrayed himself to be. McCain-Feingold has long been one of the outgoing Wisconsin senator’s hallmark achievements. Unfortunately, the U.S.
